


The 5 Times Alec Tells Magnus He's Beautiful + the 1 Time Magnus tells Alec

by musicnerd



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: 5+1 Things, Communication, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Episode: s02e15 A Problem of Memory, Episode: s02e18 Awake Arise Or Be Forever Fallen, Episode: s02e20 Beside Still Water, Fluff, Healthy Couples Talk About Their Feelings, M/M, Minor Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-26
Updated: 2017-12-26
Packaged: 2019-02-21 22:05:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,398
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13152963
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/musicnerd/pseuds/musicnerd
Summary: 5 Times1: 2x18 continuation of Magnus' eyes scene2: Random fluff plus tiny bit of a plot3: 2x15 continuation of Magnus talking about his past scene4: Random fluff5: 2x20 added content after Magnus and Alec make up outside the bar1 Time6: Random minor angst





	The 5 Times Alec Tells Magnus He's Beautiful + the 1 Time Magnus tells Alec

**Author's Note:**

  * For [gracie_the_shadow_writer](https://archiveofourown.org/users/gracie_the_shadow_writer/gifts).



1.

“Sometimes… I lose control.” Magnus turned his head to face Alec, his golden eyes darkened by shame. Alec couldn't even fathom how they held that look, how could something so beautiful be so saddened by itself. He had seen these eyes only a few times before. First, when he Isabelle, Jace, and Clary had gone to Pandemonium to exchange Magnus’ long since stolen necklace for information. He had honestly thought it was just a trick of the light until he had seen them the second time; at the party for Max’s rune ceremony, when he had revealed them to Alec’s youngest brother. 

“Magnus, they’re beautiful… you're beautiful.” Alec pulled him back down for a kiss, and to resume what they had started.

“Wait.” Magnus propped himself on Alec’s chest, with a hand keeping him down, “You don’t think they’re strange? Unappealing?”

“Of course they’re strange, Magnus. Your average person doesn’t have golden cat eyes. But that doesn’t make them unappealing. They’re a part of you. And I love every part of you.” Alec answered. 

“They don’t make you uncomfortable?” 

“Exactly the opposite. I love your real eyes, I wish the world was a better place so you didn’t feel like you need to always hide them. I’d love to see them more often, if you’re okay with that.” Alec responded. 

“I love you so much.”

“I love you too, every part of you. Each one of them is more beautiful than the last.” Alec leaned up, Magnus now not even trying to use his hand to keep pushing him down, and kissed him deeply. 

 

\------------------------------------------------------  
2.

 

“How dare the Institute use this picture for my file, I look awful in it.” Magnus scowled at the image. It was an old photo, likely from the beginning of the 20th century based on the quality. Magnus was wearing Turkish robes, a turban, and just hints of black kohl on his eyes. He was in what must have been a grand palace, with expertly designed marble floors and carved granite pillars, one of which he was leaning against, very obviously posing for the camera.

“You looking awful? Impossible.” Alec quipped.

“Hush. That outfit is a disaster and my face looks like I was drunk.” Magnus gestured to the picture as if his criticisms were so glaringly obvious they couldn't be missed.

“Well I can't claim to be an expert on fashion from whenever and wherever this was taken, but I know everyone there could see and everyone here can see that you looked great.” Alec reassured.

“It was just before World War 1 in Constantinople.” Magnus replied.

“Whatever you think you may have looked like in Constantinople doesn't matter because I know that you are beautiful, then and now.” Alec leaned down to kiss Magnus.

“You’re just trying to win good boyfriend points.” Magnus speculated. “I mean, you definitely are winning them but still you should value honesty more than this.”

“No, I just think you’re gorgeous.” Alec smiled goofily. 

“I hate you.” Magnus laughed and leaned in for a kiss.

Suddenly Jace and Izzy entered the coms center, “Get a room, dorks.” Jace grumbled. 

“Leave them alone!” Izzy shot back, “But come on guys we have a mission to prep for.”

“They’re right. We’re at the Institute, we’re here to work.” Alec sighed.

“Everyone stop harassing us,” Magnus jested, “I know you’re envious of how much better we look than all of you, as couples in whatever relationships you have partaken or are currently parking in and as individuals, but that’s no reason to be rude.”

“Magnus, we’re at work.” Alec defended his siblings points.

“Yes I know but I find massive and unnecessary hyperbole funny.” Magnus explained.

“Alright boys, back on business. Rogue vampire on the loose in Manhattan. Raphael has agreed to help us hunt it down seeing as it’s very likely that Camille was the sire and it’s important that the New York vampires can all get behind dismantling any and all power she holds in the city.” Izzy explained.

“Since fledglings have the urge to return to their sires, it’s very likely that following this vamp will lead us straight to Camille so we can re-lock her up after she escaped the Clave.” Alec observed.

“Anti encanto spells are beginners work for any warlock. If they could let one of us into Alicante more than once a decade, the Clave wouldn’t ever have these issues.” Magnus pointed out.

“Couldn’t you have just put the spell on her when you sent her to the Clave?” Jace asked.

“That’s not how the spell works at all. Shadowhunters might also be able to plan things better if they had at least a basic understanding of how the warlock magic they demand from us actually worked and the are certainly not going to learn by isolating us from where they constantly need us to conduct business.” Magnus answered harshly.

“Guys.” Izzy clapped her hands in front of their faces, “Let’s refocus. We need to keep constant surveillance on the rogue vamp until they go find Camille, however we also need to be at the ready in case any mundanes or anyone else gets attacked. It’s been about twelve hours since the fledgling was turned based on my analysis of the mundane attack crime scene we found. That means that they’ll be desperate to find Camille at this point. Go get your weapons ready and be back here in ten minutes, all four of us will be following the vamp until they’ve located Camille or they attack someone. Be ready to draw stamina and wakefulness runes because we are keeping all eyes on our rogue until we have to intervene.” Izzy left the group with their orders to go prepare for the mission. 

The other three also left to go get their weapons and steles, well Magnus followed Alec and flirted with him while he gathered his bow and arrows and re-rune them. Jace and Izzy soon met them after they returned to the coms center.

“Maia and Bat scented our rogue last at 5th and Broadway so we’ll start there.” Izzy declared, “Magnus, if you’d please.” She gestured for the warlock to conjure a portal. Magnus opened one and the team of four stepped through.

 

Nearly two hours later, the shadowhunters and Magnus had finally found a last location of the fledgling. After minor bickering from Alec and Jace, who apparently had issues with their parabatai tracking, Magnus eventually took the hair Izzy had collected from the initial crime scene and got a better location.

“East, he’s headed towards the Upper East Side.” He announced.

“Anything noteworthy up there?” Alec asked.

“Camille has an apartment.” Magnus groaned, “Since she has a permanent ban from the Dumort and the New York clan raided her other place for the artifacts, it’s the only place in the city she’d have left to stay.”

“Why wouldn’t she leave the city? She’s lost all of her power here and every shadowhunter and vampire are out to get her.” Jace pondered.

“She won’t leave New York until she takes her last hail mary to restore that power. She’s had an affinity for this city since the Jazz Age, to her, it’s an empire she’s determined to maintain.” Magnus explained.

“And she plans to reclaim it by turning new vampires loyal to her.” Izzy speculated, “We’ve got to get to her before she turns any others or more mundane lives are at risk. Magnus, lead the way.”

The warlock followed the signal his magic gave him off the hair with the group behind him. Only thirty minutes later, Magnus spotted the vamp around an alleyway corner. 

He pointed it out to the shadowhunters behind him. Immediately, Jace and Izzy took the lead. All three nephilim ran their steles over silent step runes and soon moved soundlessly behind their target. Magnus took the cue and glamoured himself so that he would not be seen or heard. 

Jace kept his hand on the hilt of the seraph blade in his thigh holster while Izzy uncoiled her whip slightly so that the handle sat in her palm and Alec loaded an arrow into his bow. 

The rogue soon turned down an alley and lept onto a fire escape. The group of four hastened their pace, still completely undetected. The vampire sprinted up to a fifth story window, seemingly deranged with need, and punched his way through the glass.

Alec and Magnus took one side of the window while Jace and Izzy went to the other. The two parabatai looked in simultaneously. Alec spotted a feminine looking figure in the dark, with long hair. She said something, quite harsh, to the fledgling who had entered and Magnus groaned. 

Jace looked over at the warlock, “Camille?” He exaggeratedly mouthed. Magnus nodded with a sigh and Izzy indicated for the group to huddle. 

“We go in there on my signal. Take in Camille first and foremost, if our new vamp escapes it’s not the end of the world, we can always catch him later. If you have to kill anyone, put your safety first but we are trying to bring her to the Clave alive for trial.” She explained. Everyone nodded and after a few moments she tilted her head in and the four of them moved. 

In a minute of confusion and panic from the vampires’ side, and calculated attacks on the other, Izzy soon had her whip around the rogue vampire’s arm and Alec had an arrow pointed at Camille’s heart. 

“It’s over Camille.” Magnus commented from behind her, “Put the fangs away and surrender then no one gets hurt.”

She sighed and turned her neck to face him slightly, “First you let the Clave use you like a puppet, now you give everything over to a nephilim. Really Magnus, it’s so ugly to see a downworlder like this.”

“Shut up.” Jace spat.

“At least you got the pretty one.” She smirked. Magnus rolled his eyes and snatched her wrists to put her in the runed handcuffs. 

“Camille Belcourt, you are hereby remanded to the New York Institute until such a time as you can be delivered to and tried by the Guard of the Clave in Alicante. Any resistance can lawfully and will be met with execution delivered by any New York or Idris shadowhunter.” Alec decreed, “Take her.” He pointed to Jace.

Magnus summoned another portal back to the Institute. Moments later, when they had all stepped through, two shadowhunters on the other end took Camille and the fledgling off their hands.

“We’ll be applying to give you full clearance in Alicante to cast whatever spells are needed to make sure nothing like this ever happens again.” Izzy assured Magnus. 

“Good. I for one don’t want to waste another Friday evening I could have spent in my loft with this, and only this, particular nephilim,” Magnus looked over to Alec, “chasing down problems the Clave creates.”

“Well, we’ll leave you to that.” Jace patted Alec on the shoulder, “See you tomorrow morning.”

Soon it was just Alec and Magnus in the coms center of the Institute, “Just so you know,” Alec said to his boyfriend, “Camille was wrong. Just like I said earlier, you really are beautiful, now and always.”

“Thank you, Darling.” Magnus kissed Alec quickly, “But you’re still wrong about that picture and it needs to be removed.”

“I promise I’ll do that tomorrow morning, but for tonight I was thinking we could act on those plans you had before we were so rudely called in.”

 

\-------------------------------------------  
3.

 

“I never wanted you to see this terrible, ugly side of me. Of my past.” Magnus lowered his head so even kneeling on the ground beneath him, Alec couldn’t look him in the eyes. 

Alec held Magnus’ face in his hand and raised it up to eye level gently, “There is nothing ugly about you.” Alec said sternly, as a matter of fact. He wrapped himself around Magnus tightly, burying his face in his shoulder to hide the tears starting in his eyes. 

“The Clave imprisons - executes - downworlders who kill mundanes. I took an innocent man’s life for nothing more than my own fear, how can I be forgiven? How can I ever be anything but an ugly murderer?” Magnus nearly wept, not letting go from Alec’s embrace. 

“By the Angel… Magnus, he hurt you. You had just lost your mother and your stepfather screamed at you, insulted you. For a child to lose a parent is already a burden enough, but to be told it’s your fault? That’s horrible. Not just that, he could have hurt you. What else were you supposed to think after he blamed you for your mother’s death? You were a child placed in an awful situation and you had to defend yourself.” Alec pulled back, looking Magnus in the eye. 

“But I still killed him.” Magnus insisted.

“And you deserve forgiveness.” Alec stated with finality, as if it were so axiomatic it couldn’t possibly be disputed or denied.

Magnus collapsed out of the chair in tears. Trapped between the sadness, anger, and guilt of the memory that haunted him and the love that seemed to pour out of Alec right there overwhelmed him. 

Alec caught him as he fell to the floor and held him in his arms, letting his head rest in the crook of his neck as they both wept. 

“Thank you.” Magnus whispered into Alec’s shoulder.

“What?”

“Thank you for forgiving me, for loving me. You saw through all my ugliness and found something to care about.” 

“Don’t you dare- don’t ever say that you are ugly again. Magnus Bane you are so amazing and wonderful and by the Angel you are beautiful.” Alec practically pleaded. He placed a kiss on Magnus’ forehead and began to stand. Magnus followed suite and with only minor stumbling, they were soon both on their feet.

Magnus wiped his eyes and looked back at Alec. He let out a short laugh and a smile took over his face, “Wow. I… I feel a lot better after saying all that.”

“That’s really good.” Alec found himself smiling through his tears as well, “You know that you can always come to me, for anything. I’ll always be here for you.”

“I know.” Magnus said, “I love you, Alexander.” 

“I love you too. And if you feel up to it, we need a warlock to portal Valentine back to Idris. We’ll have to be getting over to the Institute soon.” Alec sighed.

“I’ll always feel up to sending that bastard to a prison where he belongs. I hope Alicante puts him through hell before they finally execute him.” Magnus remarked with his normal confidence returning to him. 

“Believe me, they will.” Alec reassured, “So want to get going now?”

“Hell no. If I have to look Valentine in the eye today I’m going to do it looking goddamn flawless and not showing any sign of weakness that he could warp into a defense of his ridiculous anti-downworlder crap.” Magnus started for the bathroom, “This will only take a few minutes.”

“I’ll let Izzy know.” Alec set his sister a brief text to tell her that he and Magnus would be back at the Institute in about ten minutes. 

Soon enough, the warlock emerged from the bathroom with his makeup fixed and wearing a jacket over his peach shirt. 

“Valentine can teleport to prison sucking on the fact that no shadowhunter will ever look as good as my downworlder ass.” Magnus announced as he entered the room. 

“Not even me?” Alec quipped.

“You’re cute.” Magnus replied, “But you don’t even own more than two colors of clothing.” 

“Was that mean?” Alec asked.

“No because I love you and that means I can tease you.” Magnus answered then gave Alec a short kiss.

“I love you too, but we really do need to get going.”

“Fine.” Magnus rolled his eyes, “You nephilim would be lost without me.”

“I wish I could say you were wrong.” 

Magnus twisted his wrist dramatically and opened his hand to unleash a portal, “Let’s send that bastard to whatever hell the Clave has for him.” He offered his hand to Alec, and when he took it they stepped through.

 

“Valentine Morgenstern, by order of the Clave, you are hereby remanded to the Guard in Indris.” Alec surmised. Valentine looked at him for only a moment before turning his eyes to glare at Magnus.

“I many be in a cell but at least I’ll be in Alicante, where the air doesn’t reek of downworlders.” Valentine sneered. The whole room seemed to silently groan in frustration.  
“Get him out of here.” Alec sighed. Jace gave him a nod. Magnus opened a portal, more superfluously than was at all necessary solely for the purpose of flaunting a power he had that Valentine never could. 

The moment the last of the transport team had stepped through the portal and it closed behind them, Alec turned to Magnus and wrapped him in a hug, “I’m so sorry you have to hear those things. I know it’s not just him, it’s half the shadowhunters in the world and having to live in a world where anyone has an attitude against you for something that you were born with, that you didn’t chose. And it’s an amazing thing that should be celebrated because you use your gift to help people and make the world we live in a better place.”

“Thank you, Alexander. It is hard to hear that stuff, to know that so many people follow his disgusting ideology. But you never cease to remind me that it’s not ugly to be a downworlder.” Magnus relished in the embrace.

“You are so beautiful, I love you.” Alec pulled back to kiss the warlock.

“I love you too.” Magnus looked up at the shadowhunter with a gentle smile. He knew he had found someone he would love for a very long time.

 

\---------------------------------------------------  
4.

 

“Why did you let me sleep in? I’ll never have time to put together a decent outfit, let alone fix this monstrosity on top of my head!” Magnus stormed out of the bedroom, ready to take on an army. 

Alec turned from the coffee machine, still stirring a spoon in his cup. He was awestruck by the warlock’s appearance. Magnus wore a blue silk robe and a few necklaces. The robe hung open enough to reveal a lavender pendant, a silver claw, and Alec’s personal favorite, an ebony arrow. His makeup, which he hadn’t had the time to properly remove the night before, was smudged around the eyes. 

Alec completely forgot what it was that his boyfriend had actually said, totally entranced by the sight before him.

“Alexander!” Magnus stepped toward Alec, “Do you realize how high a caliber of disaster this is? I’m meeting with one of my top paying clients today! Not even a dumb mundane who’ll overpay for a basic summoning, an actual warlock coven that’s going to drop-” Alec interrupted him by grabbing his face and kissing him softly.

“Alexand-” Magnus yelped.

“I love you.” Alec smiled.

“Darling, I love you too.” Magnus replied adoringly, “However I am also furious at you-”

“Magnus!” Alec laughed. He grabbed the warlock and pulled him into a tight hug.

“How are you not taking this seriously?” Magnus grumbled.

“Love, you have actual magic!” Alec kept him in the embrace as he chuckled, “While you being able to do everything you do with hair and makeup by hand is amazing, you can also literally move objects with your mind. I know you can get ready in time.”

“I... Alexander…you” Magnus stood there trying to form something coherent, “damn you for being right.”

Alec let go of Magnus and just stared at him, shit eating grin wide and full.

“Stop that! I already look horrendous at the moment, I don’t need you making me feel anymore silly for being upset over nothing.” Magnus scolded Alec.

“I’m sorry babe, I didn’t mean to make you feel silly.” Alec answered, “And you could never look horrendous. You are, and always will be, gorgeous.”

“I love you and your sentiment, but you are just simply incorrect. You made me smile and I could see the eyeliner that somehow got onto my cheek. It is impossible to look even halfway decent with that horribly placed makeup.”

“You look perfect.”

“There’s mascara in my eyebrow.”

“Amazing.”

“My contour is giving me an extra cheekbone.”

“Stunning.”

“The foundation on my neck somehow got unblended and now I’m two different shades.” 

“Literally none of that matters because you are the most beautiful man in the world and I love you. And if you don’t believe me I can say it in like six different demon languages because Hodge was really strict as a tutor when I was younger.” Alec rubbed his hands up and down Magnus’ arms to comfort him.

“I’m incredibly flattered but please never say anything remotely romantic in a demon language. I can’t think of a single thing that is worse.” Magnus smiled.

“What if I had to flirt with a demon as a part of a mission?” Alec quipped.

“The Clave would burn if they made my boyfriend do that.” Magnus replied.

Alec giggled, “I’ll inform the Consul.” He kissed him again before stepping back and taking a sip of coffee, “Based on when you normally get up and get ready, you really should get started or you might be late.”

“You spend all morning distracting me and now you have the audacity to tell me I’m running late!” Magnus lightly slapped Alec’s arm while the shadowhunter wore the smuggest smirk possible.

“There’s no winning.” Alec held his hands up in mock surrender.

Magnus glanced over Alec’s shoulder at the clock on the coffee maker, “Love I hate you so much for distracting me and forcing me to rush, but more than anything I hate you for being right.”

“I love you too,” Alec leaned down to give Magnus a quick peck on the lips, “now go get ready, Beautiful.”

Magnus rolled his eyes, huffed, and stormed to the bathroom. Alec set his mug down on the counter and went into their bedroom to find himself something to wear. Opening his side of the closet, he was greeted by about ten identical black sweaters, two black shirts, a gray training shirt, and his one denim button up that Magnus loved. 

Hoping it would cheer him up after what must have been such a frustrating morning, although it was really hilarious for Alec, the shadowhunter went with the blue shirt and a pair of black pants. By the time he had put his outfit on and was strapping his thigh holster to his leg, Magnus had finally emerged from the bathroom.

His makeup was fully corrected; eyeliner around his eyes, mascara on his eyelashes, and probably at least ten more products put back where they belong on his face but Alec honestly didn’t know anything about makeup besides the basics and even that was dodgy at best. 

“You look lovely!” Alec called over his shoulder as he went back into the kitchen to make breakfast. 

Just as he had finished frying a few eggs, Magnus finally stepped out of the bedroom, completely ready for the day.

He wore dark navy blue leather - truth be told Alec had no idea what material they were but they looked shiny and leather’s normally shiny, right? - pants with a lighter blue shirt tucked in. The shirt had swirling white patterns across it that reminded Alec of a flower garden. Over the shirt he of course wore his many necklaces and his fingers also adorned a ring each.

Magnus turned to face the full body mirror on the outer bedroom wall, “I really do want to put on that violet sport coat but it’s just a bit chilly today. Should I go with the black double breast, the one with the sequins?” 

Alec could vaguely recall which coat he was talking about, “Wear the coat, it’s cold and you get grumpy when you’re cold. And you also say black goes with everything so…”

“You’re right.” Magnus gave himself one more look in the mirror before turning around to face Alec, “And everyone gets grumpy when they’re cold.”

Alec couldn’t do anything but smile, “Eggs?”

“Yes I will take one, but it’s got to be to-go. I’m already running late.” Magnus shot him a look.

“I’m sorry, Babe. But you are beautiful, before and after you do your whole routine.” Alec answered.

“I love you, now I have to leave.” Magnus conjured a portal and stepped into it. When Alec turned back around to the frying pan, one of the eggs had disappeared.

He started at the pan for a moment, thinking intensely, “Wait, how the hell is he going to eat a fried egg on the go?”

\-----------------------------------------------------------------

“You must think the worst of me, running away from you instead of at least trying. What kind of coward could do that?” Magnus averted his eyes. 

Alec sighed and moved closer on the couch to Magnus, “You are not a coward.”

“Yes, I am. I- I left you because I was scared. You told me we could do this with Valentine on the loose and hunting warlocks but I was so afraid I didn’t even think.” Magnus kept his head low and fiddled with one of his bracelets. 

Alec held Magnus’ cheek, not to move his face, just to run his thumb up and down in the hopes of coaxing the warlock to so much as look at him, “You had to make a choice. Or at least you thought you did and it was an incredibly brave one. You could have stayed with me and had permanent safety from Valentine, assuming he never actually summoned Raziel, while your people were left vulnerable or you could have left and protected them, as their leader should. You made the best decision you could and you made it thinking only of others and their lives. That is the most courageous thing a person can do.” 

“But I didn’t think about you. I left you- I broke your heart! If I could hurt someone I love the way I did…” Magnus trailed off.

“We found our way back to each other, we always will. You did the right thing, even if it hurt me, it helped so many others.” Alec reassured, “Now let’s celebrate. Valentine is dead, he can’t hurt anyone anymore. The Circle will lose any power it could have hoped to have left. And we are good, we have each other again.”

“I guess we didn’t book the Hunter’s Moon as a private party for nothing.” Magnus laughed, “And it’s so silly of me to be emotional right now, when I put so much into this ensemble.”

“You’re not silly.” Alec smiled, “And your outfit is… wow.”

“I assumed I would be seeing you, so I maybe tried a little too hard.” Magnus blushed.

“We were broken up and you still wanted to look good around me?” Alec pondered.

“First of all, I always look good. Second of all, I wanted us to fix this but I was too nervous to approach you because I thought you’d be upset with me for leaving you in the first place so I figured if I made you want me by looking good, as I always do, then you would come talk to me.” Magnus explained in a flurry.

“That was… devious.” Alec thought out loud, “And you are right, you’re always so beautiful.” 

A smile had crept onto Magnus’ face and managed to extend itself so wide his eyes and nose crinkled around it, “Thank you, Alexander. I love you so much.” He leaned over and wrapped his arms around Alec.

Alec immediately reciprocated the embrace, “I love you too. Promise me you’ll never leave me like that again?”

“I promise.”

 

\---------------------------------------------------------  
\+ 1.

 

“How is it that you can even stand the sight of me let alone care for me? I'm nothing but scars and runes and whatever the hell it is my parents or the Institute or the Clave wants me to be.” Alec held Magnus away from himself with a hand on his chest. 

“Darling, you are so much more than that. You are incredibly brave and a phenomenal leader. There’s not a shadowhunter in New York who doesn’t respect your authority and trust you to keep them and their families safe. Even the downworlders are happy about your leadership because they know that they’re safer and that they’ll always be held as equals in your company. On top of that, you’ve taken on demons and monsters that would leave most other nephilim quaking in their boots. Every mundane in the city owes you their life a hundred times over. Alexander, how could you ever poorly of yourself?” Magnus explained thoughtfully.

“My people, shadowhunters, nephilim - whatever grand name we can think of to prop ourselves up- we’ve hurt you and your people since we began our very existence. By the Angel, even our damn Consoul, the highest authority, was a member of the Circle. You said yourself the morning after you healed Luke, it’d ruin your reputation for the world to know that a shadowhunter had spent the night. Every rune on me is a symbol of the power the shadowhunters have abused to damage the downworld. How is it that you don’t hate me every time you see them?” 

“Because I know who it is that’s underneath all of them. Alec, you are not a reflection of the acts of every shadowhunter before you. While it is true that the nephilim have largely targeted and oppressed the downworld, you seek to break that mold. You want to be better them and you want them to be better than who they used to be. Anyone can see that in how much you wanted to become the Head of the Institute, and how hard you’ve worked to see that power used for good.” 

“Aren’t you afraid of what could happen to you, being so involved with shadowhunters? Isn’t that why you left me in the first place?” 

“No. I left because I was afraid of Valentine and what would happen to my people because of him. I have never felt any fear by your side amongst New York shadowhunters because I know that you are nothing like the Circle and you personally will always protect from any shadowhunter who meant me harm. And when I said that my reputation would be lost if anyone found out you spent the night… I was exaggerating to say the least.”

“What?” Alec asked.

“Really I was just trying to deflect my disappointment that you were so revolted to have slept in the home of a downworlder.” Magnus said.

“Oh Magnus, I’m so sorry I made you feel that way. But if it’s any consolation, I was more upset with myself for spending the night in the house of another….” Alec trailed off. 

“Alexander, you never should feel bad for being gay. The Clave, the shadowhunter culture conditioned you to believe certain things about yourself and downworlders. I know that for a time you did harbour at least a few less than equal ideologies. But you broke every old they put before you. You thought you could never be happy with someone you truly loved, that you would be forced to marry a woman. And you threw away that notion, quite dramatically also, really in a way that no straight man ever could,” Alec snickered at that, “and you also cast out the beliefs you were raised in that downworlders are below you. Now you run an Institute that seats a council of us. No less than at a round table, so that we face the problems of New York as equals.”

“Thank you, Magnus. I’m terrified that, as I wear the symbols of nephilim, I’ll become someone like Valentine. That I’ll be some ugly, twisted, hateful brute who could someday hurt you.” Alec sighed.

“I see you use your runes. I see you fight like a shadowhunter and you do it beautifully. You use the power granted to you by the Angel and privilege meant for good. The person underneath your runes makes them so beautiful.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! I apologize for some of the parts being so much shorter than others but truth be told I couldn't bring myself to keep writing the angsty pasts yet at the same time they felt important to address as significant points in Magnus and Alec's relationship. 
> 
> Please comment if you spot any mistakes I missed, I'm more than happy to run back in and fix them.


End file.
